One of my clients is a friend, mentor and quite frankly a human who used to scare the shit out of me. A person the old Becky (and many others) would find intimidating. This person’s accomplishments, expertise, conviction and manner could make anyone feel a little timid. Not because this person wants that, but because they are a high-achiever, and their assertive command is actually a part of their eccentricity- the part of them that makes them feel alone. When he came to me for help with his anxiety, I understood, again, how easy it is to misjudge and how important this work is.

I wanted to share this for two reasons. Firstly, to acknowledge the absurdity of me coaching someone who I found scary. Years ago I used to hide my coaching posts from this client and from others I knew who were like him. But I once was told that people who seem a little critical or question what you do are often the most interested. The ones who avoid it, often know they need what you have to offer. If you ever shy away from sharing your gifts for fear of criticism, please remember that the ones who need it most might MISS OUT. I am always honoured to do this work, and it does feel pretty special to support someone who made me nervous and uncomfortable for years!

Secondly, I want you to know that if you feel completely misunderstood, its more than just that you, are a little odd. High-achievers come with a more visible duality and a level of complexity that can be quite intense and jarring. People make sweeping statements like ‘He’s the CEO but he’s an asshole’ or ‘She the sweetest person, but she’ll beat the shit out of you.’ You might be considered an energiser bunny, but you really feel like the laziest, most stuck person you know. Babe, one thing you can always do to be at peace with this is gently, but boldly, be more yourself than ever. Say what is real to you. Reveal the part of yourself that you think should be hidden, because it is a human trait, not just a YOU trait. Don’t use vulnerability as a marketing tool. Just be vulnerable without saying it. Risk your heart everyday because in the long run, it’s the kindest thing you can do for yourself.

My friend and I are working together because I first shared with him some of my truths that were so unexpected and plainly delivered that we both laughed for ages. Then he said ‘me too’.

I’m choosing to believe that the key to deeper connection is to be openly more me. Maybe you can choose to believe this too. The floor might feel like it’s collapsing beneath you, but it’s the smallest fall. Like sighing and flopping on a bed that feels as safe and easy as home.

Lot of love,

Becky